Have you ever tried 
To imagine what my
Shoes feel like?
Never in one spot.
Always moving.
Cities.
States.
They get heavy,
Filled with the weight
Of wanting.
Wanting consistency.
Confidence
The wanting 
Of silently begging
To be noticed. 
I drag my feet to
Get where I'm going.
It's slow.
But I get there. 
There's scuff marks
But there's no tear.

Have you ever tried
To imagine what my shoes 
Feel like?
Always missing the big things
To look at faces and floors
That don't look back.
Wishing you could be
Somewhere else
But you can't be mad 
Because YOU made your feet
Move.
YOU chose this. 

Have you ever tried
To imagine what my 
Shoes feel like?
If you have,
Could you tell me
How to make them
Lighter?

It’s all that we have
When I’m gone.
I don’t even want to use it
When I’m home.

I keep it close to me
Like I would keep you
Close to me
If I could touch your hand.

I fall asleep holding it
As if it is the only thing
Connecting us.
Because it is.

One day,
Maybe we won’t
Have to live
This way.

One day,
I will never have to
Fall asleep holding
Something that’s not you.